I woke up this afternoon with a pretty bad hangover. Its my own fault. I haven't been sleeping too well lately, haven't been eating much and I drank a ton. I was tempted to take an aspirin when I finally came to, but decided to do some research on the internet before hand. Here's what I learned.
How to cure a hangover.
Sleep. Rest is your best friend at this point to give your body a recover. It is best to stay in bed so call in to work if you have to, tell them you have the stomach flu. You will sound so horrible on the phone they may believe you (unless they saw you at the bar, not a good idea then).
Replenish your body with water, fruit juice such as orange juice that contains Vitamin C, sports drink like Gatorade or Powerade that will help bring your electrolyte count back to normal. Some people say pickle juice is also a good remedy.
If you absolutely need some pain relief try Alka Seltzer Morning Relief. It contains aspirin and caffeine but is made just for hangover symptoms.
Eat mineral rich food like pickles or canned fish. Bananas are also a natural antacid to help with the nausea, and are high in magnesium which can help relax those pounding blood vessels causing that hangover headache. Apples, prickly pear cactus, persimmon, raw cabbage or sauerkraut and natural ginger containing food has also been known to help.
Get some exercise
Drink a Bloody Mary. While the popular phrase “hair of the dog that bit you” may sound logical with a shot of whiskey left in the bottle next to your bed, it’s only temporary. Try a Bloody Mary instead, while your blood is dealing with the new alcohol it is ignoring the old and in the mean time tomato juice and celery are full of vitamins. If you drank the last of the vodka make a Virgin Mary. Another spicy morning after drink option is Hair of the Dog, in which gin and hot sauce are sure to bite your hangover back.
The side effects of aspirin, Tylenol and ibuprofen can be magnified when alcohol is in your system, so it is best (even though it may be the first thing you reach for) to avoid them to kill the hangover pain. Aspirin is a blood thinner, just like alcohol, and can intensify its effects and Tylenol (or acetaminophen) can cause more damage to your liver. Ibuprofen can also cause stomach bleeding. So be cautious when going for the quick relief.
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How to prevent a hangover:
Don't drink. (doh!)
Take a Berocca before you start drinking. This gets a reserve of Vitamin B into you.
Try one of the many anti-hangover remedies found at convenience store registers and drug stores. I have heard good and bad things about these but have never tried them personally, but it is an option.
Eat before you go out! Eat anything. One thing I've heard about quite often is eating anything with peanut butter. I'm not sure to the exact reasonings but peanut butter is healthy for you none the less. Also anything starchy like bread and pasta will slow the absorption of alcohol.
Before you go out drink tons of water! This will help make you feel full, promote getting up/moving around while you have to go to the bathroom and gives you less time to drink overall:p
Alternate fruit juice or water in amongst your drinks to avoid dehydration later on. Avoid fizzy or sugary stuff. The purists reckon that about 200ml of water is needed to effectively counteract each 30ml of alcohol.
Remember: The alcohol in carbonated drinks is absorbed more quickly than in non-carbonated drinks.
Reduce the amount of sugar you consume with your alcohol. The forced metabolism of sugar AND alcohol by your body will accelerate the depletion of B vitamins and make the hangover worse.
Memorize this rhyme and abide by it, it will save you a lot of pain. “Liquor before beer, never fear (Or in the clear). Beer before liquor, never sicker.” Its worked for me!
Choose the booze carefully. Again, dark spirits contain more congeners, light spirits fewer, cheap liquor more. More congeners equal more headaches. Stick with quality light color drinks most of the night to reduce your hangover.
Go for a walk. Get up, stretch out, get some fresh air. This will help you sober up (if only for a few) and help you feel better later on.
Consume less than one drink per hour. Your liver breaks down alcohol at the rate of one beer per hour, so spreading out your drinking over many hours will give your body a chance to keep up with you.
The 2am pig-out. Pizza or pasta is usually best since cheese and carbohydrates are a good source of amino acids. Actually food is a good idea all round - before, during and immediately after drinking. Food doesn't absorb alcohol, but it does increase metabolism, activates alcohol absorption, and increases the speed with which the body processes alcohol.
Important: If you experience tremors, stomach pain, or see blood in your vomit seek professional medical attention IMMEDIATELY. You may have overdone it too much and should go to the emergency room right away.
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Here's hoping I never feel like this again in my life.
*Cheers*
Sunday, May 31, 2009
Saturday, May 30, 2009
How To Eat Out On A Budget
How To Eat Out On A Budget...
And Still enjoy it!
Order only water to drink with your meal.
Restaurants make big money off soft drinks and alcohol. A Coke from their dispenser costs them mere pennies. On your tab, it can easily be $2. Water is zero calories, zero fat, and it's still usually free.
Buy one get one free.
This offer, usually with a coupon, is the best thing going. In today's economy, restaurants are clamoring for more customers. Watch newspaper ads, insert fliers, and often when you eat at an establishment they will give you a discount coupon for next time. Don't forget the restaurant's corporate website. Often you can download a coupon for a special offer.
Skip the appetizer and dessert.
I haven't ordered an after-dinner desert in a restaurant since... forever. Instead, we sometimes go out for a Saturday afternoon and as a special treat we order only the dessert. That way, we've enjoyed an outing that was reasonable in price and we didn't overeat. Plus, places like Applebee's have desserts to die for.
Order an appetizer or two as your meal
Many restaurants near me offer 1/2 priced appetizers either during happy hour or late nights (after 9pm) This is the perfect time to order a few appetizers for cheap and fill up. Bonus is you usually have enough to be full and some to take home for the same price as an entree.
Watch for restaurants offering lower priced meals.
It's a common occurrence these days. Many popular food chains are cutting prices to bring in customers. It pays to shop around.
Go out for breakfast or lunch (instead of dinner).
Dinner is prime time in the restaurant world. The prices are higher and the portions are larger. The lunch menu will probably have most of what is offered for dinner, but in smaller quantities and at lower prices.
Breakfast is universally cheaper than any other meal. It's just as nice to get away in the morning as it is in the evening. Plus, many places offer breakfast around the clock.
Eat out early in the week.
One of the best places to go are buffets for this. If you go early in the week, they usually charge less per person than if you go on a Friday or Saturday. Mondays are usually dead in the restaurant business, so many will lower their prices to bring in customers early in the week.
Birthday person eats free.
Most national chains and many local eateries offer Birthday Clubs of some sort. The birthday person usually eats free when 2 or more dine on the person's birthday (or during the month of the person's birthday).
Order large and take home.
Many suggest ordering a half order. In my opinion, that's a poor choice as usually a half portion is only discounted about 15% from the cost of a full-sized meal. It's better to order a large meal and eat only half of it. Ask for a doggie bag and take the remaining half of your meal home for tomorrow's lunch. It's a better use of your money.
Order the Blue Plate Special.
Daily specials are usually at a reduced price to entice people to order up. Making a larger batch makes more money for the restaurant and they usually pass on some of the savings to the customers who take advantage of their Blue Plate Special.
Take advantage of catering schools.
Is there a catering school or chef school in your area? Culinary students need to practice on real people to build their skills, so schools usually offer some really good high-class vittles at dirt cheap prices. Both the food and the service is part of their curriculum.
And Still enjoy it!
Order only water to drink with your meal.
Restaurants make big money off soft drinks and alcohol. A Coke from their dispenser costs them mere pennies. On your tab, it can easily be $2. Water is zero calories, zero fat, and it's still usually free.
Buy one get one free.
This offer, usually with a coupon, is the best thing going. In today's economy, restaurants are clamoring for more customers. Watch newspaper ads, insert fliers, and often when you eat at an establishment they will give you a discount coupon for next time. Don't forget the restaurant's corporate website. Often you can download a coupon for a special offer.
Skip the appetizer and dessert.
I haven't ordered an after-dinner desert in a restaurant since... forever. Instead, we sometimes go out for a Saturday afternoon and as a special treat we order only the dessert. That way, we've enjoyed an outing that was reasonable in price and we didn't overeat. Plus, places like Applebee's have desserts to die for.
Order an appetizer or two as your meal
Many restaurants near me offer 1/2 priced appetizers either during happy hour or late nights (after 9pm) This is the perfect time to order a few appetizers for cheap and fill up. Bonus is you usually have enough to be full and some to take home for the same price as an entree.
Watch for restaurants offering lower priced meals.
It's a common occurrence these days. Many popular food chains are cutting prices to bring in customers. It pays to shop around.
Go out for breakfast or lunch (instead of dinner).
Dinner is prime time in the restaurant world. The prices are higher and the portions are larger. The lunch menu will probably have most of what is offered for dinner, but in smaller quantities and at lower prices.
Breakfast is universally cheaper than any other meal. It's just as nice to get away in the morning as it is in the evening. Plus, many places offer breakfast around the clock.
Eat out early in the week.
One of the best places to go are buffets for this. If you go early in the week, they usually charge less per person than if you go on a Friday or Saturday. Mondays are usually dead in the restaurant business, so many will lower their prices to bring in customers early in the week.
Birthday person eats free.
Most national chains and many local eateries offer Birthday Clubs of some sort. The birthday person usually eats free when 2 or more dine on the person's birthday (or during the month of the person's birthday).
Order large and take home.
Many suggest ordering a half order. In my opinion, that's a poor choice as usually a half portion is only discounted about 15% from the cost of a full-sized meal. It's better to order a large meal and eat only half of it. Ask for a doggie bag and take the remaining half of your meal home for tomorrow's lunch. It's a better use of your money.
Order the Blue Plate Special.
Daily specials are usually at a reduced price to entice people to order up. Making a larger batch makes more money for the restaurant and they usually pass on some of the savings to the customers who take advantage of their Blue Plate Special.
Take advantage of catering schools.
Is there a catering school or chef school in your area? Culinary students need to practice on real people to build their skills, so schools usually offer some really good high-class vittles at dirt cheap prices. Both the food and the service is part of their curriculum.
Invest in The Entertainment Book
The Entertainment Book provides entertainment coupons, including restaurants, for specific cities. The book ranges from $20 to $45 per book and coupons run 15 months, from August to the following November. As summer approaches, the book goes down in price. If you prefer to only get coupons you think you will use you can subscribe online for a monthly fee of $3.99 and print coupons from your computer. This is a good option if you are planning a vacation and just want coupons specific to your holiday destination.Friday, May 29, 2009
Are you wanted by the police?
I urge all citizens to be on the lookout for...
Hilariously Bad Police Sketches
Look like anyone you know?
---
Civilian Mug Shots
While celebrity mug shots get most of the ink (see: Nolte, Nick), the best booking photos are those taken of perps whose names are not of the household variety.
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Celebrity Mug Shots
With celebrities getting arrested on an almost daily basis, there were many stars to pick from for this roundup.
---
Unearthed Mug Shots
There's plenty more, just search google.
These are the ones that amused me at the time.
Hilariously Bad Police Sketches
Look like anyone you know?
---
Civilian Mug Shots
While celebrity mug shots get most of the ink (see: Nolte, Nick), the best booking photos are those taken of perps whose names are not of the household variety.
---
Celebrity Mug Shots
With celebrities getting arrested on an almost daily basis, there were many stars to pick from for this roundup.
---
Unearthed Mug Shots
There's plenty more, just search google.
These are the ones that amused me at the time.
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Pwned
Pwned
The Funniest Pwned (Owned) Photos Of All Time
Pwnage!
A corruption of the word "Owned." This originated in an online game called Warcraft, where a map designer misspelled "owned." When the computer beat a player, it was supposed to say, so-and-so "has been owned."
Instead, it said, so-and-so "has been pwned."
It basically means "to own" or to be dominated by an opponent or situation, especially by some god-like or computer-like force.
Instead, it said, so-and-so "has been pwned."
It basically means "to own" or to be dominated by an opponent or situation, especially by some god-like or computer-like force.
"Man, I rock at my job, but I still got a bad evaluation. I was pwned."
OR
"That team totally pwned us."
OR
"That team totally pwned us."
From Urban Dictionary.com
The Funniest Pwned (Owned) Photos Of All Time
Pwnage!
Monday, May 25, 2009
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Animals acting like humans (Vid Heavy)
Friday, May 22, 2009
Animal Behaviors That Science Can't Explain
Animals do a lot of strange things: dogs will go after their own butts for hours, some fish fly and if some people are to be believed, sheep have the amazing ability to attract New Zealanders and Scotsmen. But there are some things about the animal world that leave the smartest of us scratching their heads in puzzlement saying, "Hell if I know..."
Animal Suicides
One of the major things that separate humans from animals is that most lower life forms have an intense will to live. Unless they are defending their babies or food, most animals will prefer to run off than fight, because life is precious. Plus, given the fact that most don't really appear to be all that self aware, the likelihood of goth hamsters and emo pigeons seems pretty thin.
Then why do some animals just up and decide to off themselves sometimes?
Well recently there were a couple of major animal suicides; in Switzerland, 28 cows decided to leap off a cliff over the course of three days, and in California, dozens of monstrous squids beached themselves.
And lets not forget Jatinga, India, where hundreds of birds from several species dive into the ground to kill themselves every year.
How Long Has This Been Going On?
That's a tough one. People don't typically record animal suicides unless it is really bizarre or a mass suicide, but studies were conducted as far back as the 1800s to try and figure out why.
But, They Must Have a Theory For This...
They do, and very few of them have anything to do with being jilted or members of a cult. Indian scientists believe that atmospheric conditions confused the birds in Jatinga, causing them to lose their sense of direction and crash into the earth, though evolutionarily speaking, that doesn't make a shit-lick of sense. There's also the old "follow the leader" theory, where they suggest that a tightly packed group is following one lost animal that is a bit sick to accidental deaths, similar to the way that some animals get lost during migration and end up leading a massive amount of birds in the wrong direction.
Still, that might explain one mass suicide, but those cows offed themselves during the span of three days. There wasn't just one line of cows lead by some misguided leader; several gangs of cows separately jumped off on their own accord.
Finally, there is the matter of the mass squid suicide. They all beached themselves around the time of an earthquake, so some figure there might be a connection. But scientists point out that squid are basically aggressive water balloons, and don't have any of the structures in them that cause fish and whales to become disoriented during quakes. Additionally, the squids started beaching themselves three days before the quake, which either means that the two events are unrelated or that squids a) can predict earthquakes (more on that later) and b) are using the earthquake as an opportunity to come on land and attack us at our most vulnerable and disoriented. Granted, that was probably the most poorly thought out invasion ever but still, it's scary to know they're planning something.
Bees Are Disappearing.
Remember being a kid and running through the grass barefoot, where halfway across the field, you stepped on a bee and instantly developed an unyielding terror of bare skin on grass? Well, the younger generations won't get to experience that joy. It seems that the honey bee population has been on the decline for years, and no one knows why. This seems like good news at first, since barefoot field-running is a joy most of us can't get enough of, but it's bad news if you like honey, wax, food or pictures of bees fucking. Bees are major pollinators, so without bees, food plants can't reproduce.
How long has this been going on?
Scientists first noticed a change in bee populations as far back as 1972, but the really dramatic drop didn't start until 2006. The decline was noticed in America and Europe first (both are known for their rich running-fields) although cases started being reported in Taiwan in 2007. It also seems to be spreading to India and Brazil, who may soon be experiencing thejoys of field running
horror of no honey or pollination.
But, they must have a theory for this...
Several, and they run the gamut from interestingly plausible to absurdly retarded. Some suggestions that don't immediately make the people suggesting them look like idiots include mite-spread viruses, poor nutrition and pesticides. On the other end of the spectrum, we have cell phone radiation. Slightly less retarded is the suggestion that cell phone towers might disturb bees, but they are hardly so ubiquitous that they are killing off massive numbers of insects, who then disappear.
Some folks are suggesting that, quite simply, we're not getting any new, healthy, baby bees because the only bees attempting to reproduce, for some reason, are related. Yep. Brother and sister bees won't stop fucking each other, and now we'll never have honey again.
Cows Have Creepy Eating Habits.
When cows aren't launching themselves from cliffs, they are usually eating. Have you ever noticed anything peculiar about cows when they eat? No? Well, neither did anyone else until some German scientists started looking at satellite photos of cows using the high tech wonder-software known as "Google Earth." It turns out that all cows, everywhere, simultaneously face north (or south) while eating.
Scientists have a pretty good idea how they do this; like most every other animal on Earth that isn't a human, cows (and deer and sheep) can detect the planet's magnetic fields, so well in fact that power lines fuck up their feeding. The big question is why in hell do they bother?
How long has this been going on?
Here's the weird thing; they are pretty sure these animals always did this, just no one noticed, (probably because the directional behavior of dining cows falls hard in the "Who Gives a Shit" category). Still, farmers and hunters didn't notice. Not even Ronald McDonald, as he surveys his fields of delicious cheese covered death, noticed. It wasn't until thousands of square miles of satellite photos were painstakingly pored over that someone finally said "Holy crap! They're all facing the same way!"
But, they must have a theory for this...
Sort of. They originally thought maybe the position of the sun or wind direction played a roll, but that doesn't account for the fact that all of the deer and cows observed faced magnetic north. So then we are left with "because" as a reason. The people who discovered it decided "screw it, let neuroscientists figure that crap out."
Blue Whales Are Experiencing Global Puberty
Scientists are a weird lot, and they do some strange stuff in the name of science. Case in point, back in the 60s, some scientists thought it would be cool to stick a bunch of microphones into the oceans of the world and record blue whales singing. Forty years later, someone got the idea to study four decades of whale song, presumably to keep the grant money flowing, when they made a strange discovery: Every blue whale in the world was singing deeper every year.
How long has this been going on?
They have no idea why, but the whales have been going all Barry White on us for at least 40 years. The important thing to remember here, though, is that this isn't just most blue whales, but every goddamn one of them. This would be like every human on Earth slowly speaking more and more like James Earl Jones every year, regardless of language (which whales apparently have) or location. The drop is small, just a few fractions of a hertz per year, but it is steady and constant.
But, they must have a theory for this...
Everything from global warming to increased noise pollution has been suggested. However, the impact of global warming on the oceans doesn't hold water (get it?!) because the changes in acidity and density that might have caused a change that the whales would have to compensate for is so minor that it in no way explains the much larger change in whale voices.
Noise pollution might be a more reasonable solution. Sure, the last time we were in a crowded bar, we didn't try to get the waitress's attention by talking in a lower key. But assuming whales aren't as receptive to high pitched cries of "who do I have to blow to get MORE BEER!?" that still means that every Blue Whale in every ocean on the goddamn planet has simultaneously been altering their behavior in exactly the same way ... for forty years. What do you have to say to each other that's so important, Blue Whales? Something you want to share with the rest of the class? Something about a secret society, operating on a higher plan, waiting to strike during the next earth quake?
Ants With Collective Intelligence
Ants have amazed us for centuries. They build tightly structured colonies, some farm and others use suicide bombs to protect their hive. Perhaps you saw this video that made the rounds a while back in which scientists fill an underground ant colony with cement. It's pretty clear that we're in for some creepy shit when 10 goddamn tons of cement disappear down the hole before it's full. But then around the four minute mark, they dig out a sprawling underground "megalopolis."
As the narrator says, somehow keeping his bowels from audibly evacuating, the tiny ants have constructed an enormous city that "looks like it was designed by an architect. A single mind." If you've ever lived in a human city, you of course realize this is a feat mankind has yet to get the hang of.
"Good for ants," you might say if you're a sucker, "Why'd jerk-ass science have to drown them in cement?" Probably because Science knows about army ants. Sure, you can put 100 army ants on a table, and they will walk around in a circle until they drop dead of exhaustion, which is pretty stupid. On the other hand, when they are in groups of thousands or millions, they can regulate their collective temperature, decide when to either settle down and sleep for the night or pack up and leave. And sometimes they use their superorganism intelligence to coordinate attacks.
Amazingly, the more ants there are, the smarter they are as a whole. Sort of works opposite of humans, who get dumber for every person you add to a group, until a soccer riot breaks out. Put enough army ants in an urban location, and it won't be long before they realize they've got the upper hand. The cement doesn't seem so excessive now does it?
How long has this been going on?
Well, they think the African and South American types of army ants formed two different groups from a common ancestor back in the Cretaceous Era, meaning army ants have been acting together to travel and terrify other animals for at least 65-million years. On the up side, if they were planning on taking over the planet, they probably would have done it already.
But, they must have a theory for this...
Swarm Theory is just starting to get a grasp on this. Scientists suggest that while the individual ants are kinda retarded, as a group they manage to make good decisions because of how each individual idiot interacts with the others. Sort of how individual brain cells are pretty useless until you get the whole gang together. This behavior is surprisingly common, with everything from ants to bees to buffalo all showing abilities to use their minds like animal-brain Voltrons.
Animal Earthquake Predictions
If there is one power animals have that qualifies them as "Haley Joel Osment" creepy, it is this. Many, if not most animals have the bizarre ability to know when an earthquake is about to happen. Some can even detect something is amiss with Mother Earth up to a week in advance, according to the U.S. Geological Survey.
Everything from cats, to dogs to centipedes will leave the area when they sense a quake coming, leaving the humans behind scratching their heads and cleaning up lost pet shit when the big one hits.
How long has this been going on?
Since the beginning of recorded history. Pretty much the day mankind figured out they could put pen to paper and record what was happening, at least one person wrote down that animals were going apeshit just before a quake hit. According to the USGS link above, the Greeks recorded in 373 BC that rats, weasels, snakes and centipedes got the fuck out of dodge days before a "destructive" quake. As recently as the 2004 tsunami, there are records that a herd of 500 blackbucks left the coastal areas in India and headed for the hills shortly before the wave hit.
You can learn a thing or two from mother nature; if the animals are running in one direction, you might want to think about following them.
But, they must have a theory for this...
There are many, but most of them are followed with a shrug and "or maybe it's magic or some shit." All of these depend on animals having some previously unknown supersense, like the ability to sense seismic waves, or possible changes in the magnetic fields before the quake hits, or changes in groundwater, ground tilt or electrical fields. Not one of these has been or is detectable by humans or our equipment, so they are about as concrete as saying "Gandalf did it." But hey, if the USGS says Gandalf did it, we're inclined to accept that as proof.
Animal Suicides
One of the major things that separate humans from animals is that most lower life forms have an intense will to live. Unless they are defending their babies or food, most animals will prefer to run off than fight, because life is precious. Plus, given the fact that most don't really appear to be all that self aware, the likelihood of goth hamsters and emo pigeons seems pretty thin.
Then why do some animals just up and decide to off themselves sometimes?
Well recently there were a couple of major animal suicides; in Switzerland, 28 cows decided to leap off a cliff over the course of three days, and in California, dozens of monstrous squids beached themselves.
And lets not forget Jatinga, India, where hundreds of birds from several species dive into the ground to kill themselves every year.
How Long Has This Been Going On?
That's a tough one. People don't typically record animal suicides unless it is really bizarre or a mass suicide, but studies were conducted as far back as the 1800s to try and figure out why.
But, They Must Have a Theory For This...
They do, and very few of them have anything to do with being jilted or members of a cult. Indian scientists believe that atmospheric conditions confused the birds in Jatinga, causing them to lose their sense of direction and crash into the earth, though evolutionarily speaking, that doesn't make a shit-lick of sense. There's also the old "follow the leader" theory, where they suggest that a tightly packed group is following one lost animal that is a bit sick to accidental deaths, similar to the way that some animals get lost during migration and end up leading a massive amount of birds in the wrong direction.
Still, that might explain one mass suicide, but those cows offed themselves during the span of three days. There wasn't just one line of cows lead by some misguided leader; several gangs of cows separately jumped off on their own accord.
Finally, there is the matter of the mass squid suicide. They all beached themselves around the time of an earthquake, so some figure there might be a connection. But scientists point out that squid are basically aggressive water balloons, and don't have any of the structures in them that cause fish and whales to become disoriented during quakes. Additionally, the squids started beaching themselves three days before the quake, which either means that the two events are unrelated or that squids a) can predict earthquakes (more on that later) and b) are using the earthquake as an opportunity to come on land and attack us at our most vulnerable and disoriented. Granted, that was probably the most poorly thought out invasion ever but still, it's scary to know they're planning something.
Bees Are Disappearing.
Remember being a kid and running through the grass barefoot, where halfway across the field, you stepped on a bee and instantly developed an unyielding terror of bare skin on grass? Well, the younger generations won't get to experience that joy. It seems that the honey bee population has been on the decline for years, and no one knows why. This seems like good news at first, since barefoot field-running is a joy most of us can't get enough of, but it's bad news if you like honey, wax, food or pictures of bees fucking. Bees are major pollinators, so without bees, food plants can't reproduce.
How long has this been going on?
Scientists first noticed a change in bee populations as far back as 1972, but the really dramatic drop didn't start until 2006. The decline was noticed in America and Europe first (both are known for their rich running-fields) although cases started being reported in Taiwan in 2007. It also seems to be spreading to India and Brazil, who may soon be experiencing the
But, they must have a theory for this...
Several, and they run the gamut from interestingly plausible to absurdly retarded. Some suggestions that don't immediately make the people suggesting them look like idiots include mite-spread viruses, poor nutrition and pesticides. On the other end of the spectrum, we have cell phone radiation. Slightly less retarded is the suggestion that cell phone towers might disturb bees, but they are hardly so ubiquitous that they are killing off massive numbers of insects, who then disappear.
Some folks are suggesting that, quite simply, we're not getting any new, healthy, baby bees because the only bees attempting to reproduce, for some reason, are related. Yep. Brother and sister bees won't stop fucking each other, and now we'll never have honey again.
Cows Have Creepy Eating Habits.
When cows aren't launching themselves from cliffs, they are usually eating. Have you ever noticed anything peculiar about cows when they eat? No? Well, neither did anyone else until some German scientists started looking at satellite photos of cows using the high tech wonder-software known as "Google Earth." It turns out that all cows, everywhere, simultaneously face north (or south) while eating.
Scientists have a pretty good idea how they do this; like most every other animal on Earth that isn't a human, cows (and deer and sheep) can detect the planet's magnetic fields, so well in fact that power lines fuck up their feeding. The big question is why in hell do they bother?
How long has this been going on?
Here's the weird thing; they are pretty sure these animals always did this, just no one noticed, (probably because the directional behavior of dining cows falls hard in the "Who Gives a Shit" category). Still, farmers and hunters didn't notice. Not even Ronald McDonald, as he surveys his fields of delicious cheese covered death, noticed. It wasn't until thousands of square miles of satellite photos were painstakingly pored over that someone finally said "Holy crap! They're all facing the same way!"
But, they must have a theory for this...
Sort of. They originally thought maybe the position of the sun or wind direction played a roll, but that doesn't account for the fact that all of the deer and cows observed faced magnetic north. So then we are left with "because" as a reason. The people who discovered it decided "screw it, let neuroscientists figure that crap out."
Blue Whales Are Experiencing Global Puberty
Scientists are a weird lot, and they do some strange stuff in the name of science. Case in point, back in the 60s, some scientists thought it would be cool to stick a bunch of microphones into the oceans of the world and record blue whales singing. Forty years later, someone got the idea to study four decades of whale song, presumably to keep the grant money flowing, when they made a strange discovery: Every blue whale in the world was singing deeper every year.
How long has this been going on?
They have no idea why, but the whales have been going all Barry White on us for at least 40 years. The important thing to remember here, though, is that this isn't just most blue whales, but every goddamn one of them. This would be like every human on Earth slowly speaking more and more like James Earl Jones every year, regardless of language (which whales apparently have) or location. The drop is small, just a few fractions of a hertz per year, but it is steady and constant.
But, they must have a theory for this...
Everything from global warming to increased noise pollution has been suggested. However, the impact of global warming on the oceans doesn't hold water (get it?!) because the changes in acidity and density that might have caused a change that the whales would have to compensate for is so minor that it in no way explains the much larger change in whale voices.
Noise pollution might be a more reasonable solution. Sure, the last time we were in a crowded bar, we didn't try to get the waitress's attention by talking in a lower key. But assuming whales aren't as receptive to high pitched cries of "who do I have to blow to get MORE BEER!?" that still means that every Blue Whale in every ocean on the goddamn planet has simultaneously been altering their behavior in exactly the same way ... for forty years. What do you have to say to each other that's so important, Blue Whales? Something you want to share with the rest of the class? Something about a secret society, operating on a higher plan, waiting to strike during the next earth quake?
Ants With Collective Intelligence
Ants have amazed us for centuries. They build tightly structured colonies, some farm and others use suicide bombs to protect their hive. Perhaps you saw this video that made the rounds a while back in which scientists fill an underground ant colony with cement. It's pretty clear that we're in for some creepy shit when 10 goddamn tons of cement disappear down the hole before it's full. But then around the four minute mark, they dig out a sprawling underground "megalopolis."
As the narrator says, somehow keeping his bowels from audibly evacuating, the tiny ants have constructed an enormous city that "looks like it was designed by an architect. A single mind." If you've ever lived in a human city, you of course realize this is a feat mankind has yet to get the hang of.
"Good for ants," you might say if you're a sucker, "Why'd jerk-ass science have to drown them in cement?" Probably because Science knows about army ants. Sure, you can put 100 army ants on a table, and they will walk around in a circle until they drop dead of exhaustion, which is pretty stupid. On the other hand, when they are in groups of thousands or millions, they can regulate their collective temperature, decide when to either settle down and sleep for the night or pack up and leave. And sometimes they use their superorganism intelligence to coordinate attacks.
Amazingly, the more ants there are, the smarter they are as a whole. Sort of works opposite of humans, who get dumber for every person you add to a group, until a soccer riot breaks out. Put enough army ants in an urban location, and it won't be long before they realize they've got the upper hand. The cement doesn't seem so excessive now does it?
How long has this been going on?
Well, they think the African and South American types of army ants formed two different groups from a common ancestor back in the Cretaceous Era, meaning army ants have been acting together to travel and terrify other animals for at least 65-million years. On the up side, if they were planning on taking over the planet, they probably would have done it already.
But, they must have a theory for this...
Swarm Theory is just starting to get a grasp on this. Scientists suggest that while the individual ants are kinda retarded, as a group they manage to make good decisions because of how each individual idiot interacts with the others. Sort of how individual brain cells are pretty useless until you get the whole gang together. This behavior is surprisingly common, with everything from ants to bees to buffalo all showing abilities to use their minds like animal-brain Voltrons.
Animal Earthquake Predictions
If there is one power animals have that qualifies them as "Haley Joel Osment" creepy, it is this. Many, if not most animals have the bizarre ability to know when an earthquake is about to happen. Some can even detect something is amiss with Mother Earth up to a week in advance, according to the U.S. Geological Survey.
Everything from cats, to dogs to centipedes will leave the area when they sense a quake coming, leaving the humans behind scratching their heads and cleaning up lost pet shit when the big one hits.
How long has this been going on?
Since the beginning of recorded history. Pretty much the day mankind figured out they could put pen to paper and record what was happening, at least one person wrote down that animals were going apeshit just before a quake hit. According to the USGS link above, the Greeks recorded in 373 BC that rats, weasels, snakes and centipedes got the fuck out of dodge days before a "destructive" quake. As recently as the 2004 tsunami, there are records that a herd of 500 blackbucks left the coastal areas in India and headed for the hills shortly before the wave hit.
You can learn a thing or two from mother nature; if the animals are running in one direction, you might want to think about following them.
But, they must have a theory for this...
There are many, but most of them are followed with a shrug and "or maybe it's magic or some shit." All of these depend on animals having some previously unknown supersense, like the ability to sense seismic waves, or possible changes in the magnetic fields before the quake hits, or changes in groundwater, ground tilt or electrical fields. Not one of these has been or is detectable by humans or our equipment, so they are about as concrete as saying "Gandalf did it." But hey, if the USGS says Gandalf did it, we're inclined to accept that as proof.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Things Worth Knowing About Your Cat
17 Things Worth Knowing About Your Cat
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More to know about your cat
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Interesting Facts About Cats
Domestic cats are interesting creatures that make wonderful household companions. Most people are aware that cats purr, have good eyesight and excellent balance but here are a few more interesting facts for all of you cat lovers out there.
An adult cat has thirty-two teeth.
Cats are carnivores which means that they are meat eaters.
The average weight of a cat is twelve pounds.
The largest breed of domestic cat is the Ragdoll which weighs between twelve and twenty pounds.
The smallest breed of domestic cat is the Singapura weighing in at only four to six pounds.
A cat's body contains 230 bones.
A cat's body contains 517 muscles.
Cats can see up to 120 feet away.
Cats can run at a speed of thirty miles per hour.
Ailurophilia is a love of cats.
A cat has 60-80 million olfactory cells which account for its good sense of smell.
Calico cats are almost always female.
A cat's front paws have five toes while the back paws have only four toes.
Cats kneed with their paws when they are happy and content.
The cat door was invented by Sir Isaac Newton.
Ailurophobia is a fear of cats.
A cat can jump five times as high as its own height.
Cats were considered sacred by the ancient Egyptians and were even worshiped as demigods.
A cat's normal body temperature is 101.5 degrees.
Blue-eyed white cats are prone to deafness.
The cat uses its tail to maintain balance.
Much myth and mystery surrounds the cat. Here are a few superstitions involving cats.
It is believed to be bad luck if a black cat crosses your path.
It is believed that if a white cat shows up on your doorstep it will bring sickness.
When a grey (gray) cat wanders into your life it is believed to be good luck.
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Charlie: The Spider-Cat
Cats are great climbers, that’s not a big secret, but a cat climbing up a 13-foot dry wall? Now that’s something you don’t see every day.
Charlie is a very special seven-year-old cat from Falkirk, Britain, who has the very special skill of climbing buildings. As you’ve probably guessed, this is the talent that got him the very cool nick-name Spider-cat.
Charlie began climbing up to his owner’s flat, on the first floor of an apartment-building, after he got bored of waiting for someone to open the front door of the building, after his daily walk around the bloc. One day he just went to the back of his owner’s home, took a long look at the obstacle in front of him and just jumped up the wall. Using his front paws for grip and his behind paws for leverage, he made it up to the first floor and started miaowing until someone opened the door for him. Since that faithful day, Charlie the Spider-cat has been climbing up the dry-wall on a regular basis.
Check out the incredible video of Charlie doing what he does best.
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